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Tuesday, October 28, 2014

One Word


So, today is one of those days where I'm just going to type words and see what happens. I am so tired, sinus headached, and spaced out. It seems like every day comes with a bit of stress but today was particularly overwhelming. I am beginning to sense a pattern that maybe Tuesday's are not great days for me. I feel like my slices have been a bit on the down side. So, to deal with my stress I will write a little passage that expresses the way I feel right at this moment.


You took my words and threw them into the air, out of context, out of order. They fell into piles. Words that didn't belong to one another now lay next to each other. Standing over them like a giant I take my enormous hands and try to piece them back together but I fumble with the tiny strips of paper. Winds begin to blow and the little bits begin to scatter in even different directions. I try to step on them but they get stuck under my toes and flap around, eventually tearing leaving some without letters. I grab at the scraps as they fly like confetti into the clouds. I listen to the skitter of dead leaves on the blacktop and watch the remaining words swirl in a furry like a storm. I look to the leafless tree that hovers over them, wondering, waiting for new words to bud as my hair blows over my eyes. I squint through the wind noticing one speck of white flattened on the trunk. I step slowly forward, pushing the hair out of my eyes as the gray wind threatens to take the white speck. Reaching out I peal the tiny strip of white paper from the trunk. It has three letters on it, Y, O, U. You. I hold the word to my heart as my hair lays flat against my back and I stand in the silent shadow of the tree limbs. You, it's all you need.

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Long Day


Today was the day that wouldn't end.

  • Four meetings eating every moment that I might have been able to breathe.
  • One meeting that had to be rescheduled because I completely forgot about it, probably because I had four others!
  • One grant, finally done and signed.
  • Items my son forgot to take to school delivered on my lunch break.
  • One student who went down a wet slide whose parents needed to be reassured it wasn't his fault for fear of him getting into trouble.
  • One student who never got off the bus today because she went to the gym instead by mistake and was missing for over an hour. We finally realized she was still in the building, THANK GOODNESS!
  • OH, and I had to teach of course!
Ah, done! I am now sitting here folding laundry starting a load of whites and getting ready to do it all over again. Hopefully with fewer people needing my attention tomorrow. One can dream. 


Tuesday, October 14, 2014

It Warms My Heart



It seems that I always have a conference night this time of year and it falls on a Slice of Life Tuesday. Thinking back, each year is different. I can say that this year brings new challenges, new families and great conferences. I am happy to hear that so many of my families are shocked by the progress their children are making. It warms my heart. I had a lovely conversation with a colleague prior to one conference and she was so complimentary. It warms my heart. I sat across from a mother tonight who is concerned for her child but eager to help her in any way she can. She listened as three of us talked about the struggles and accomplishments. She was happy in what could have been a very difficult conference. It warms my heart. I had a funny conversation with a colleague tonight, we laughed, hard and it was a nice break during a tiring night. It warms my heart.
It warms my heart to know I am surrounded by happy children.
It warms my heart to know that families are happy.
It warms my heart to know that colleagues appreciate my work
It warms my heart to be in the place I am right now.

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

My Words Were Lost


I sort of feel like I've been in a breakup. I used to write a poem almost everyday. If not everyday I had a line or something I was working on. This was a time in my life where words were flowing easily. I haven't written a poem in months and it has begun to haunt me a bit. I've been looking for them but I've been uninspired.
I used to search for birds everyday near a pond on my drive to work. When I was fluidly writing poetry, even if my poem wasn't about them, they seemed to get words flowing. But, the birds have not been there. The cranes, the egrets, the blue heron, they have been gone. I still look everyday. This past Friday my son said, "Mom, I just saw three cranes." I replied with a somber, "Really?" If I hadn't already been running late it would have been one of those days I would have turned around. But I didn't. I continued to live the day uninspired. I really didn't believe he saw them anyway, why would they decide to show up now?
This morning there was a thick mist rising from the pond and it caught my eye. I looked out to see the sunlight attempting to burn off the fog and it created this blanket of light. Standing there under the warmth of this morning were three cranes. One with his head up and two with their heads down. They were standing like a single statue in that mist, as though they were all part of one piece of art. Then the other two slowly raised their heads and the three stood at the edge of the water together, looking at what, I'll never know. I like to think they were looking at me. Like they found me. Like they had been searching too.

I've been looking
under rocks
in the wet leaves
at the cranes that reach
their necks high in the sun
and low in the grass.
I didn't find you.
I thought you were in their shadow
hiding among the blades
but instead I found dew.

Near the pond I sit
waiting on this breeze block
wondering if you will show
in the ripples of this water
in the grains of this sand
and when I look out across
these reflected clouds
I see you on the other side,
the other side of these words.