The Gym

I can't believe it. I actually went and purchased a gym membership. I don't know how to feel. I have always been the kind of person that felt like, "hey, I can just do whatever at home, or run on the road, no biggie. Who needs the gym?" Well, apparently I do, cause I don't have a lot of weights and that is what I need, weight training. I have become so weak over the years, even with working out and running, I don't have the strength that I need. So my husband finally dragged me to his gym and I am a member. I don't even know when I will be able to go. I bought a book with several work out programs that there is no way I will be able to do with my schedule. I have a gym membership that I might be able to use on the weekend, seriously, what was I thinking?
Hmph, well, there goes that brilliant idea. At least it's only $10 a month.

A Slice of the Moon

I step outside
I step inside
I look one more time
I step back outside
Fresh cool air hits my lungs
It is welcomed.
There is a gleam
A sheen
On the glaze of ice
That encases the snow
On my front yard
The glittering sparkle
Shines brightly
From the moonlight.
I smile
Its light hits my eyes
I feel the sparkle in me
It is a slice of the moon
Saying hello
And goodnight.

Poetry Pulse

I've noticed something. I haven't written much poetry in many months, but since the challenge started I've written a poem almost everyday. I think this is interesting. I think when the chance to write opens itself up, poetry is my go to. I find this interesting because most of my writing these days is education related, writing related, article related, not poetry related. But, poetry is my love. It is what I breathe whether I write it or not. It is me. I love that this side of me has a place to go. That I can find something each day to write a slice of poetry. It makes me so happy, calms me a bit, makes me feel complete in my imperfection.

I'm reading Brown Girl Dreaming by Jacqueline Woodson right now and pg. 20 keep lingering in my mind. I can't stop thinking about it, 

"Somewhere in my brain

each laugh, tear and lullaby

becomes a memory."

I feel this poem. I feel this verse. It is the core of me and has been for a long time. And here it is, on these pages, resonating in my mind and heart.

Sweet Disposition

Observations from my day in poem form.

Sweet disposition
sunshine streams
with parallel icy glares
surrendered smiles
white lies
sly grins
mistakes
pretending
to be actual
perfection seeking
sad eyes
staring in stress
little strength to give
frustration melted
into tears
dancing in a puddle
on her cheek...
this isn't fair.

Listening

Tonight while doing dishes I was listening and jamming out to my favorite music. Now I sit here, listening again to my Spotify playlist and lines ring through my ears. I can't help but write some of them down along with portions of lyrics and my own twist.

I get lost in my mind
while lies shake the dirt
like a gardener
but I am not a robot
I am a warrior
in this tower
I take a walk
and what do you know
I'm a king
I'm a lionheart
howlin' for you
young blood
say it, just say it
little secrets
punching in a dream
I'm delirious
and sweet sick
tried and tired
I lay me down
I sleep
as you push me down
and cry for the one's I love.

I was reminded today at how much I love poetry. How there are no rules. How I can write whatever I want and it's meaning may only be for me, it doesn't matter. I love it. It's for me. No one needs to get it, I get it.

Inspirational credit goes to:

The Naked and Famous

The Black Keys

The Mowgli’s

Passion Pit

Steve Aoki

Of Monsters and Men

Kimbra

The Head and the Heart

The Tallest Man on Earth

Marina and the Diamonds

Bronze Radio Return

Groundhog Day

"Don't live the same year 75 times and call it a life."  --Robin Sharma

I've been having a hard year. There, I said it. We all have times like this. I find myself in a pattern lately, a hard pattern. I don't think I am feeling sorry for myself, but I think I feel sorry about my circumstances, which I can't seem to change. So I am setting out to do something else. I am setting a goal to live each day a little better than the one I left behind. My One Little Word this year is, OPEN. I will be open to change. Open to possibility. I will be open to making each day better. Even if it is just an extra smile. I tried that today. "Just smile more," I thought to myself. I did. It was good. It was a little better.

Living.
A state
of consciousness,
but not all
conscious,
sometimes
unconscious
and untimely.
We live among
the days,
along for a ride.
But the ferris wheel
goes high,
wind in my hair,
I can't help but smile

Haircuts!

It was haircut day!

We took the day off school to head back home from my parent's house today. That meant we had a little time this afternoon for some kid haircuts.
My son is soon to be a ten year old and my daughter will be eight this month. Wow, were they ever spunky. I think there were seven rounds of the quiet game played by both of them, they even included Ryan, our haircut professional, a few times. Hilarious! He did not win.
What's funny about the quiet game? Well, when my kids play they constantly say, "pause...(insert conversation), unpause." Each game session has several of these moments. It isn't really the quiet game when it is paused and unpaused constantly, but it is pretty funny.